Closure
As most of you know, Carmen and I split a week ago. Having moved out this weekend I found out some things (which I wont go into), which has made me feel a lot better. I am still upset about breaking up, but what was really concerning me until this morning (which, I never told anyone) was if I was throwing away a repairable future with Carmen. This morning was the proverbial last nail in the coffin, so I now know that it was completely over even before we came to a heads last weekend. So I feel better in that I don’t have to worry about making a mistake.

The unfortunate thing is that we have now done and said things which will mean we may never be friends either, which in its self is a shame as I think had we simply split up we would have been good friends / travelling buddies. Maybe time will prove me wrong, but it will take a lot of time on both sides now.

Goodwood: Festival of Speed
On a brighter and sunnier note: Corde, Ken and I got up at the crack of dawn to head off to coast to Goodwood on Sunday. As we rocked up, the heavens opened and we saw visions of miserable day, but within only half an hour the sun was out and by mid afternoon I was already nursing a light sunburn (yes! In England).

Sunday is the hill climb race day, it isn’t as much a race as it is a showcase of motorcars/bikes over the last century. Ranging from original coal powered contraptions to current formula 1 cars. There were about 6 of the current f1 drives there, including Kimi, and Fisichella, as well as some oldies like Damon Hill. Some fabulous cars there, lots of 2006 supercars, concepts cars, heaps of classics. Best part of it, is you can walk around the pits, talk to all the drivers, peak inside. Photos are coming, but I have limited internet access at the moment. Really great event if you are motor enthusiast, still good when your not like me!

As some of you know, I found out about a month ago that Carmen Doran was having an affair with a married man at her work, Simon Forsyth.

Actually, the saga goes back a bit further then that, I initially found a number of text messages from him on Carmens cell phone over six months ago. At the time Carmen denied everything and said they were just a joke and flogged them off. This is as far as I know when she started systematically lying to my face. As over the next 6 months, she had more and more excuses for coming home late, staying in to see the night shift multiple times a month, and each time I confronted her about it - I got accused of being paranoid and was driving us apart.

Then about a month ago I found more, and she admitted some things but again denied a lot. I really wanted it to work out, so we were going to give it a really good attempt at making it work, Carmen promised she would break off anything she had going on with Simon. So that brings us to today...

So Carmen was late home last night, and this afternoon Simon had sent a number messages such, 'you were so good last night' and 'I want you so bad right now' with other simpler messages of xxxxx, mul (miss you lots), looking forward to seeing you soon etc.

So having broken up, Carmen has now admitted they were together.

Not entirely sure what I am going to do, need to find somewhere to live.

Can someone forward this to Kathryn (Simons wife, so she too can know the truth as I feel she should have an informed choice whether to stay with a cheating husband).